Well, it’s been quite a while since I last blogged. Life hasn’t been rolling along on any type of consistent basis. And that will have to be okay. It’s a season, another season, no matter how long. And, besides, I’m mastering the art of “going with the flow”… Always something new to learn or consider…
On the first day of April last year, I think I was in Italy, writing and enjoying the countryside and a book-publishing deal… Today, I’m in France, sitting at a little outdoor-cafe table, listening to great music, jotting notes for more stories, getting ready for another screenplay production, considering more acting adventures, flipping dreams into reality, and wondering just a bit why my adventurous soul mate hasn’t shown up. I requested a table for two, just in case. But I know the waiter thinks I’m just imagining things.
Part of what I just wrote is true for today, and part will be true for another day. That’s what’s great about April 1. You can say whatever you want to. ; ) (And, technically, it’s after midnight, but since I’m still awake, it’s still the first of April.)
What’s great about the “soul mate” part is that I don’t need him. That might sound cold, and I don’t mean it to be. It’s just that I believe every person is complete already, except for the type of completion only God can give; I don’t believe anybody else can complete another person. I think it’s unhealthy and unrealistic to try to place such a heavy weight on someone else. But all that’s for another blog. I’m just sitting in this little cafe, minding my own business, and leaving a chair open for him to join me.
And I won’t settle. No amount of pursuing from the wrong guys will win me over. In fact, too much pursuing and pestering sends me in the opposite direction. Look, it’s either a match made in Heaven, or it isn’t. And maybe that’s my idealistic and romantic side talking. But whatever you want to call it, that companionship will be another beautiful aspect of this life’s journey. My realistic self tells me he might be lost in this chaotic world, trying to slay too many dragons and getting cuts and breaks and bruises and scars in the process, and is doing his best, but possibly will never meet up with me this side of Heaven. And I have to be okay with that. And I am. (And this is where I start counting my blessings, including not living in a Third World country, etc., etc., etc.)
But truly, if my soul mate has lost his way and never shows up, I always have Jesus. And I don’t care how schmaltzy that might sound. No human love could ever replace His extraordinary Love… Truly amazing what this God/Man has done… He makes life a true adventure, in the good times and the not-so-good times; He understands me like no one else, and loves me unconditionally, knowing better than I do what needs healing and alignment in my life; and always challenges me to really live each new day.
No matter what’s included in each new day, though, I can’t imagine living life passionless, on half speed, or without wonder, hope, and faith. It all goes by too quickly to settle for anything less. Yes, I believe in wisdom, but there’s that other part, that fearless part, that attracts me — that “jumping into the water immediately” kind of deliberateness. Whether in actions or thoughts or through words or artistic expressions, shouldn’t life be lived boldly?
Before you get to your final Earth day, shouldn’t you be as determined as you can in every way your circumstances allow — and not just for yourself and seeing your own dreams come to fruition, but for others as well? Aren’t we all supposed to be connected as human beings, as brothers and sisters, on this planet in all kinds of ways?
When your circumstances don’t offer much room for expansion, why not knock down those obstacles and keep on going, no matter how difficult that might be, no matter how long it might take? Wouldn’t it be worth it to try? Because one day, you won’t have that chance anymore… And just in case you think it’s too late for you, know that as long as you have breath, you have that chance. Keep breathing with purpose…
Consider a hero. A hero is someone who says yes to doing what’s right and good without justifying why she/he shouldn’t. And it’s right and good for you to take hold of your own life again with a firm grip and renewed strength. Since God’s the ultimate hero, and since we’re all created in His image, don’t you think there’s a bit of that in all of us — the potential for being something even greater than what we can imagine, a “new self,” just like the earth reawakens each spring? Is it too much to think that your life here can be better than worse? What would happen if you risked believing in what might seem impossible? And why not be the hero in your own story, in your own sphere of influence, first, and then reach out to help others too? No attempt is too small, and no prayer too little, right? These are the questions I ask myself. And maybe you’d like to chew on them also. Some of the big questions. The more you chew, the easier to swallow and the better for digestion. ; )
All these thoughts about living, really living and not just walking through life, are linked to a friend’s passing on to Heaven a couple days ago after a lengthy battle with Alzheimer’s disease, one of the cruelest illnesses known on this planet. Death has a way of either causing you to turn away and live life to the fullest, blindly — or causing you to look at your own life and keep moving forward, courageously, which is a different type of “fully,” before your season on Earth has ended…
And so, I choose again to continue the journey, with better vision for this day, with Him leading me, through all the mountain and valley times, knowing He has a way of making even the bad turn into something good in the end, even if we don’t see what it is ’til Heaven… And at that point, we won’t remember the challenging, painful, heartbreaking seasons here – or will we? Hopefully, we will remember them in some fashion, but they’ll be like distant memories with no roots, the kind that can’t affect us anymore. I believe our minds will be working better than ever… And won’t it be wonderful to see God face to face someday, to see His smile and hear His voice and that kind and genuine laughter of His? Don’t you just love genuine, infectious laughter?
I hope you’ve had a lovely first day of April, everyone — with more joy waiting for you down the road, the kind of joy that wraps you up in arms of comfort when you need it, and lets you go to run as fast as you can, to jump as far as possible, and to free-fall with your dreams as a parachute and His big hands as a trampoline, now and forever…
Okay… I think my next blog may just be another recipe. Something light like a salad… ; )